Update on Goals

If you have been following the blog, you probably noticed a post I did about the goals I have for the blog.  If you continued to read, you probably noticed… that none of the goals have been accomplished 🙂 YET!

I am not trying to make excuses, but just hoping to let you in on what’s going on in my life at the moment.  I recently got a promotion at work, which is great, but it means more responsibility and longer hours.  At the same time, Ryan is working on his residency application (and I am trying to help as much as possible).  This is a huge and scary thing because it determines where we will end up for the next 3 to 6 years.  So there is a lot of thought that goes into it, as well as a lot of discussion.  And of course, the application itself has a million different sections and requires a LOT of time.  Ryan is also back at the hospital working 10 hour days and some overnights, I typically work between 9 and 10 hours per day, not on the same schedule of course, that would be too easy 🙂  So we are trying to carve out any moment that we are both at home to work on this application and do the basics around the house – laundry, errands, etc. – you know the drill.

So I guess what I’m getting at is that the blog has taken a backseat for the moment, and probably will continue to until Ryan gets that application sent in.  I will post as I get brilliant ideas – I’m actually doing a lot of organizing around the house because it’s my favorite sanity saver!  But of course I haven’t been taking pictures 😦  But until we have a spare hour or two to get to work on the blog – yes, I admit, I am a terrible techie and need Ryan’s help – the blog will probably not change in appearance much.  I have been trying to post on topics that don’t necessarily involve pictures, but I know pictures are what draw me in to read a post, so at some point, we’re going to have to get that piece working.  Just bear with me, please! 🙂

 

Why did I put this off?

Unfortunately, we currently live in a world that is not at peace.  It seems like every day we are reading about a shooting in a school or workplace, a bombing, or other violent, unpredictable acts.  It makes me think about the importance of being “prepared” in case something like this happens to us. Not that you can really be prepared for it… but there is one super easy thing you can do in the event something terrible happens.

Get out a post it note or a small piece of paper.  On it, write your name, date of birth, and names and phone numbers of three emergency contacts – your spouse or partner, parents, siblings, children, close friends, etc.  Write down any medications you are allergic to, and make a list of any medications you use every day, the dose, and am/pm for the time you take them.  If you are diabetic, pregnant, epileptic, have a bleeding disorder, or have another major health concern, write that down as well.  Fold it and put it with your driver’s license or other main form of identification.  That’s it!

This means, if something terrible happens to you, hopefully the people attending to you will know your name and age, how to get ahold of those closest to you, if you have any medication allergies, and what medications you’ve taken that day that may affect your treatment.  They will also know if there are any health issues that they need to consider in their decisions.

This is not a foolproof system… obviously, you may be separated from your belongings or wallet.  But on the chance your stuff is still with you, this could save your life.  You may be in shock or just not able to think or speak clearly, so this information is critical.

This truly took me less than 5 minutes to do mine, and less than 5 minutes for my husband’s.  I think I put it off because it’s a rather morbid activity. Honestly, I hate thinking about these things.  God forbid this is ever needed.  But it’s better to have it and not need it, than to need it and not have it.  At least that’s what I think 🙂

Of course, if you start a new medication or have a new health concern, you will want to modify this as needed.  Please take a few minutes to do this and give yourself a little peace of mind!

Update: About 2 weeks after I did this and drafted this post, I got into a car accident.  Thankfully it was really minor and no one was injured, but when I went to get my driver’s license to give to the officer, I saw the important information paper with my license and was relieved that should I have needed to go to the hospital, I would have had the information needed.  The accident was not my fault, but I was seriously shaken up and I don’t know that I would have been able to think clearly enough to give the pertinent information to the hospital staff, if needed, assuming I wasn’t injured badly but just needed to be checked out.

Getting Organized for a Job Search

Job searching is a daunting task, especially in a crummy, sluggish economy.  It seems that we are taking one step forward and two steps back – one month there seems to be job growth, the next, unemployment claims are unexpectedly higher.  I am no economist but I certainly believe it will be quite a while before the economy bounces back to what it was before the recession, so I think for now we have to try to settle into it, and make the best of it.  For those of you out there who are recently entering the workforce after graduation or a leave of absence, or those of you who were laid off as a result of the economy, I’ve compiled a few tips that I have gleaned from my own job search, working with a career coach, and lots and lots of research.  Hope these help, and please share your tips as well!  Best wishes to you for a successful job hunt!

1.  Polish your resume and cover letter.  There are dozens of great resources on this topic – just do a Google search and you will likely find something valuable.  Always have someone else check your drafts, though – it doesn’t have to be a professional, it can be a friend, parent, sibling, spouse, neighbor, doesn’t matter!  Having someone looking at it with fresh eyes means you are more likely to catch typos and formatting issues than you would be, looking at it for the 15^th time.  And once you’ve sent it in, you can’t go back and fix typos!  Don’t disqualify yourself for something so trivial – just have someone give it a quick once-over.
2. Consider what types of jobs you are targeting, as well as the location.  For me, job searching becomes extremely overwhelming, very quickly, because I have a hard time narrowing down my search.  Have a list of job types you are targeting (administrative and accounting, for example, or law enforcement and emergency management) as well as a location – and be picky!  If you would like to work close to where you live, look for jobs in your neighborhood!  You can always expand your search as necessary.
3. Write down what you want and do not want in a job.  If you are brand new to the workforce, you may not have too many criteria, but if you are looking to change jobs, consider your reasoning.  Maybe the job you have now is too sedentary, too far from home, or you have 15 bosses reminding you of the error you made on your TPS reports (haha).  Jot down everything that comes to mind as something that you want, and keep the list handy when you are job searching – just read the job description and see how many qualities the job seems to meet.  [Hint – if you have trouble figuring out what you want in your next job, start with what you don’t want – then what you do want will become more clear.  Certain personality types are more able to identify what they don’t want than what they do (yours truly included).  For example – I did not want a job where I would have to work late and Saturdays, just as a standard of the job – so my want came to be “consistent and predictable hours.”  Now when reading job description I look for their information about hours.  If it says 9 – 5, bingo!  If it says evenings/weekends as needed, I pass it up.]
4. Make sure your resume and cover letters are appropriate for the jobs you are applying for – if you are targeting multiple types, make sure you have several versions of your resume playing up characteristics for each.  One job likely gave you a huge variety of experience, and you can edit your bullet points to fit different types of jobs.
5. Make a list of websites to target; otherwise you could be aimlessly searching all day.  Ask around for recommendations in your area, or again do a Google search and choose from there.  Again, you can always expand your search – but you need a starting point.
6. Keep a record of what jobs you have applied for – save the description in your bookmarks.  You would not want to be disqualified for accidentally applying to the same job multiple times!
7. Keep copies of your resume, references, and any performance reviews from past jobs handy.  If you get a call and they want to schedule an interview right away, you don’t want to be running around trying to track these things down!  Also make sure to let your references know ahead of time that you are job searching and they may be getting a call.  You don’t want them to be caught off guard and thinking, hey thanks for letting me know about this, and consequently not talk you up as much as they would have otherwise!
8. Get your suit drycleaned.  You want to be ready any time an interviewer calls, so make sure you have a clean, pressed suit, that fits well, appropriate shoes, and jewelry and pantyhose (as needed).
9. Be patient.  Know that you are not alone in this process.  Keep a positive attitude and when you start to get overwhelmed, take a break!  You will find something 🙂

Send Perfectionism Packing!

It seems like the more people I meet, the more perfectionists I know. In fact, I can’t think of anyone who isn’t a perfectionist in one aspect or another of their life. The great thing about perfectionism is it drags the best out of you, even though it may take some kicking and screaming. The bad thing is that it can be paralyzing. If you can’t do it right, don’t do it at all is typically the attitude. Let’s break down this attitude.

First of all, anything is better than nothing. If you have a goal of writing a novel, at some point you are going to need to pick out a title, a general topic, and names of some of the main characters. There’s nothing wrong with spending a few minutes thinking about these little details, especially if you’re not really in the mood to write. If you have a goal of starting to exercise 30 minutes 3-4 days per week, but you just ate dinner and you can’t possibly go jogging now, spend 2 minutes doing squats and crunches.  Or take a quick walk around the block. If you can’t bring yourself to do the whole sink full of dishes, do 5 items and take a break. Over time, little steps add up to big changes! Don’t let yourself think you have to do it “perfectly” from beginning to end, or you will never get started.

You don’t have to do it all at once. Again, say your goal is to write a novel. You cannot possibly do that in a day, a week, or even a month. Even professional writers take months to write and edit their work.  Start by breaking up a goal into smaller steps – picking a title, developing a general idea of what you want the book to be about, some of the characters’ names and descriptions, an outline of the first few chapters, your ideas of how you want the book to end, etc. Set a goal of writing 10 pages per month. If you take a lot of small steps, you will get there. Don’t get impatient and give it up before you even try – you can do it! Same with exercise… you don’t have to go out and run for 45 minutes. Try a 20 minute walk or a 10 minute jog and build up to it. Trying to do everything at once is just setting you up to be miserable and fail, and give up before you’ve given it your best shot.

Don’t throw out all of your progress over one mistake. How many times have you been following a weight loss program, and you have a terrible day and reach for an Oreo, and the next thing you know, you’ve gained 10 pounds back?! It’s all the perfectionist attitude of well… I messed up, so this day/week/month is shot. I may as well just have fun now, and I can start over later. Look at a mistake for what it is. You ate ONE Oreo. Okay, maybe three or four. So go eat a piece of fruit or take a walk around the block. Everything is NOT ruined unless you allow it to be.

You don’t have to wait till the “perfect” time. How many times do people say they are going to start a new diet or exercise program on Monday, or when they find a new job, or move out of their current apartment? There is no time like the present. Just take one step toward your goal. Sure, maybe something will be easier if you’re at a job where you work fewer hours, but who knows when that will come down the pike. Make the best of your circumstances as they are. Do what you can. If you keep waiting till the “perfect” time you will likely find that that time never comes.

Go easy on yourself. Everyone has days that they are exhausted and the last thing they feel like doing is exercising or writing or working on a chore. Sometimes, it’s okay to sit on the couch and watch reruns of your favorite show. Just don’t let that become your new routine. Go to bed a few minutes early and get up the next morning and try again.  You are your own worst critic. Think about what you would say to a friend in your situation. You would likely be much more understanding of him/her than you are of yourself.

For me, perfectionism is a huge struggle. It’s not something you just “get over” in my opinion. Just like meeting a goal, letting go of these mindsets takes effort. Do you have any other suggestions?

Slow Down and Pay Attention, Part 2

This is a follow up to the post I wrote recently about slowing down and paying attention.  I caught myself, after the fact, of course, being rushed and not paying attention, and I cost myself extra money in the process! Thankfully, it wasn’t another car accident… but it was related to the first one I wrote about!

I took my car into the shop to be repaired.  I had a reservation for a rental car for the time that my car was in the shop.  The other driver’s insurance was supposed to cover everything, and when I set it up with the claims adjuster, she specifically told me not to get any kind of insurance on the rental, because I was already covered by my auto insurance.

I was in kind of a hurry to get to work, even though I had told my boss I was going to be late.  The repair shop was super busy and I waited around for quite a while.  When the rental car rep was finally ready, one of the first things we discussed was insurance.  Granted, she wasn’t very clear, but I thought that I had waived all coverage… but I actually signed up for “damage waiver” coverage, for $19 per day!

I didn’t catch my mistake until I got to the office and really looked at the form.  Of course, I was frustrated with myself because that is going to come out of my own pocket.  But as always, there is a lesson to be learned.  Looking back over the situation, I realized a few things:

1.  There was no need to be in a rush to get to work.  My boss knew I was going to be late, and I didn’t have any calls or meetings scheduled early in the morning.

2.  I should have been very clear up front that I did not want any insurance coverage whatsoever.

3.  I should have looked the documents over completely before signing them.

4.  Since the rep was a little bit confusing in her terminology, I should have asked for clarification.

I can sum all of these points up in 2 phrases – slow down, and pay attention!  Why do we rush and create unnecessary costs and headaches for ourselves?  Ultimately, we cost ourselves more time (and obviously money) by rushing than we would if we just took a deep breath before making quick decisions.

Anyway, lesson learned!  And word to the wise – if you have collision coverage on your personal vehicle, you DO NOT need to get it on a rental car!  A lot of credit card companies also insure rental cars for their customers.  From my research, it seems that rental car reps actually earn a commission on selling the insurance, so they will definitely push it.  Just make sure you really understand what you’re agreeing to – and don’t sign a contract until you’ve looked it over carefully!

Do you have any real life examples of consequences from not slowing down and paying attention?

Slow down and pay attention

Recently, I was involved in a car accident.  It was not my fault; the other driver skipped through a stop sign and turned right into my path.  When I realized she was not going to stop, I slammed on my brakes, but I couldn’t swerve out of the way because another car was coming the other direction.  I ended up skidding into her.  Thankfully, no one was injured, and the damage was very minor, but it’s a headache.  It costs a lot of money and time for everyone involved, from the police who have to write the report, to both parties tracking down and paying for the accident report, both parties spending time documenting the accident with their insurance companies, contacting the other person’s insurance, getting both cars inspected and repaired, getting a rental car while your car is in the shop, getting reimbursed for your expenses, and on and on… it’s a huge drain on resources.

Of course, as with most things in my life, it got me thinking 🙂  How much do we cost ourselves by not slowing down and paying attention?  The car accident could have been completely avoided had the driver slowed down at the intersection and paid attention to the traffic coming.  I’m not trying to be critical; I know she didn’t deliberately set out to cause an accident, but I think we are so scattered and rushed in our everyday lives that we create a TON of additional stress for ourselves, in addition to the cost of time and money.  I’m sure her insurance rates went up in addition to paying the physical damage to her car up to her deductible.  Her insurance company paid for my repairs and rental car as well, and don’t even get me started on the number of phone calls and emails it took to get everything arranged!

To me, it’s also a mini wake up call to myself that I need to slow down and pay attention.  I need to back off my own stress level and pay attention to my health.  The night before, I couldn’t sleep, and I just had a really panicked feeling, which is very unusual for me.  I was going through all of my family members and friends to reassure myself that everyone and everything was fine, but what do you know – the next morning, not 5 minutes into my drive to work, I get into a car accident.  That seemed like a flashing yellow sign to pay more attention to those feelings.  I need to listen to my intuition, because in that case, it was completely right.  And while I am very grateful that no one was injured, it also made me think about not taking my health for granted.  I’m lucky to be able to walk and talk and drive and pretty much do anything that I want.  So again, I need to pay attention to that and not take it for granted.

Anyway, just a couple of deep thoughts from yours truly 🙂  Have you ever had this kind of mini wake up call or epiphany?  How can you slow down and pay more attention in your own life?

Subtle Signs of Major Stress

Have you ever experienced the super-annoying eye twitch?  I find that my eye twitches when I am more stressed out than I consciously realize.  The very first time it happened, I was 11 years old, in sixth grade, and had to read my D.A.R.E. essay out loud to the entire school.  I got up to the podium, and my eye started twitching!  To add to the stress, I was convinced that everyone in the audience could see it!  I’m sure they were wondering why I kept rubbing my eye 🙂  Now that I realize no one else can actually see it, despite how obvious it seems to me, it’s a great opportunity for me to take a step back and assess what is going on and how I can reduce my stress level.

Here are a few other signs I’ve noticed:

-migraines – multiple in a short period of time, without any known triggers

-trouble sleeping – can’t fall asleep, wake up and can’t go back to sleep, can’t get up in the morning

-heartburn when you wouldn’t normally have it

-racing thoughts at night or when you’re trying to focus on something

-trouble concentrating on the task at hand

-changes in appetite – for me, typically craving really sweet and unhealthy foods, for others it may be not being hungry at all

-impatience with traffic, coworkers, family, you name it when you normally wouldn’t be

-forgetting things – such as the time I left my work laptop at home on my way out the door and didn’t realize it until I got Faith to daycare!

This is by no means an all-inclusive list, but these are all things that I have noticed when life gets chaotic, sometimes many of these at once!

Noticing the issue doesn’t cure it… but it will help you realize that there may be going on in your brain than you’re even aware of.  When this happens, I try to make a list of what’s going on in my life that’s creating stress, and decide what I can do about it – let it go, get help, stop putting it off, talk to someone about it, or whatever other actions may make sense for a given stressor.  A lot of times, taking a step back and writing it down helps a lot!  It’s great to get stuff out of your head and it’s usually not as scary when it’s all on paper, as opposed to bouncing around in your head at 100 mph!

What other symptoms of stress do you notice?  What’s your preferred way of dealing with it?

Limiting my online presence

Some of you may be surprised to know how low-tech I am in my free time.  I spend all of my work day in front of a computer screen, so when I’m not at work, I try to minimize my time spent on the computer/my phone.  I actually didn’t get a smartphone until about a year ago.  I had a blackberry for work when I worked in public accounting, and the constant barrage of emails at all hours really created a lot stress for me.  Let me run through the most common programs and apps and tell you if/how I use them:

Twitter – I don’t use it.  It seems like people either love this or hate this… and I don’t have many people in my life that use it, so I’ve never really considered it.

Instagram – I don’t use this either.  It is one of those things that seems like you could get lost in and waste hours on.  I don’t have a particular interest in photography and you can usually see the photos you want to see without having Instagram, so I don’t see the need for it at this point.

Pinterest – I had an account for about 2 weeks before deleting it.  It was information overload for me and completely overwhelming.  I know people spend HOURS browsing… there’s nothing at all wrong with that… I just don’t want to spend hours of my non-work time at the computer.  Plus, I would pin things and then never come back and do anything with them, so that sort of defeats the purpose, right?!

Facebook – I have an account, but don’t use it much.  I deleted the app off my phone because it was too much of a distraction at times J  Occasionally I will get an email that I have a message or something that needs to be checked, but other than that I don’t get on it.  I found that I would spend hours reading up on what other people were up to instead of just living my own life!

Blog subscriptions – I don’t subscribe to any blogs.  I bookmark them and check them when I can, which is basically daily.  I really don’t like getting a ton of emails, so I prefer this way.  I know some people swear by different feeds, etc., which again – if it works for you, then great!  But I’ve found that this helps me be more selective and only check up on blogs that are really interesting and inspiring to me.

Again, there is NOTHING wrong with any of these programs.  I just found I was spending too much free time on the computer so I have made conscious decisions to step back from it.  These can all be really valuable tools for ideas, keeping in touch, making connections, etc. so I’m not trying to discourage anyone from using anything.  But I think a common sentiment is that we are all too dependent on technology and the internet to get through the day, and if you need some suggestions for limiting your online time, I hope these are helpful J  And by the way, I don’t use snapchat or any of the other new, trendy apps… in fact, I’ve heard of them – but don’t even know what they are!

Are there any programs or apps that you don’t use?  Which ones do you use the most?

Goals for this blog

If you are reading this post, let me just say how much I appreciate it.  Writing about organizing projects and trying to bring more peace and calm into my life is something I really enjoy and am passionate about, and I hope that I can help you, even in a small way.  That being said, since I work 50 or more hours per week outside the home, I don’t have a ton of time to spend making every detail perfect on this blog.  I’ve been drafting posts and thinking about starting a blog for months, actually a couple of years now, and I finally decided to just do it and I will improve as I go.  So please bear with me while I get this up and running and lookin’ good! 🙂

Here are some goals of mine for the blog:

Figure out which header I want – there are a bunch of different colors of headers that my husband put together, and I want to get the size just right too.

Better/more pictures – I’ve done some research on photo posting and editing, but I know that there’s going to be a learning curve for me and I just haven’t had the time to go through it all yet.  But ultimately, I want to have pictures with each post, and I want them to be big and look pretty 🙂

Get my right sidebar in good shape – there are a lot of things I don’t like about the right side, but I’ve spent some time trying to fix them and haven’t gotten too far – I will get there!

Get feedback from anyone and everyone – I would love your feedback about the blog design, my posts, topics or questions you would like to see me write about, etc.  I am brand new at this so I am VERY open to suggestions 😉

Set a posting schedule – right now I am thinking about 3x per week.  It takes quite a while to draft, proofread/edit, get pictures together, and actually publish the post.  I don’t want to over stretch myself and not have good quality posts, but I don’t want to post so seldom that no one maintains interest.  What are your thoughts on that?

I have a bunch of projects that I want to share but need to sit down and draft the posts and get the photos in good shape.  I have some series ideas that I want to try as well.  Again, please let me know if there is anything you want to see addressed, and I will work it into my schedule!

Please feel free to leave a comment here with any feedback or suggestions you have.  At some point, I will get an email set up {another goal!} but for now, since I do have a full time job and want to maintain some privacy, I don’t want to give out my personal email address.

Thank you so much for reading!

How I am making the most of summer

Summer has always been my favorite time of year.  Of course, when you’re working full time, managing a business on the side, and have a husband who is working and studying – both full time… it’s not quite as carefree as it used to be!  But I still love the longer days and warmer weather.  I like to spend more time outside, taking walks, grilling out, swimming, you name it.  With everything on our plates, though, we’ve been trying to just take advantage of the longer days to get things done!

We’ve made a couple of simple guidelines for ourselves that are really helping our productivity during the week:

1.        No TV until after 9… or no TV at all.  This really isn’t hard for us… but if we aren’t intentional about it, we will flip on the TV when we are procrastinating on something, and the next thing you know, we’ve wasted most of the evening.  It is nice sometimes to turn it on at 9 or 9:30, just to wind down before bed… otherwise, if I keep working until I go to bed, I’m wired and can’t fall asleep!

2.       I deleted all apps on my phone that are time wasters.  I’m also staying off Facebook.  Again, this isn’t that difficult.  Facebook was always just a distraction for me, more than something I was “addicted” to.  It is just about intentionally staying off of it to prevent an hour or more lost looking at people’s pictures!

3.       We take a walk most nights after dinner.  This forces us to change out of our work clothes but into something other than our pajamas and gets us up and moving.  When we get home, Miss Faith is tired and will rest for the evening, and we can get work done around the house, I can work on business stuff, and Ryan can study.

4.       We spend our weekends with family and friends as often as possible.  There’s no snow or ice to worry about on the roads, it stays light outside until 9:30 or so, and there are tons of graduation parties, showers, weddings, birthday parties, etc.  We go to as much stuff as we can, which also forces us to be productive during the week so we can have a fun weekend!

5.       We help each other.  I helped Ryan make a study schedule for his board exam later this month.  I also help him remember to work on things for his residency applications, etc.  Ryan helped me by making my site graphic.  We take advantage of pockets of unexpected free time to go to the grocery store or run other errands, so it’s one less thing to do on the weekend!  We are working for the same goal – to have time and energy to do the things we need to do, and also carve out time and space to relax when we can.

So maybe we’re not spending evenings and weekends at the pool, but we are taking advantage of the nice weather and long days as much as possible!  Summer always flies by so we are trying to make the most of it, even though we’re crazy busy.  Of course, we go out for the occasional ice cream too 🙂

What are you up to this summer?  How do you make the most of it?  What is your favorite time of year?